This time of year is great! stressful, busy, depressing at times, but great. And I like to reflect back in my journal and read the Year in Review from the Writings of a Pathetic Loser. And I’ve noticed that I’ve gotten better at not putting myself down…wow…well, for humourous purposes only..

I contribute that to finally taking an antidepressant. This is something I rarely talk about, and I won’t because I feel I’ll cheapen the understanding and caring that I feel for anyone who is going through mental health. Because I think I always have a humorous tone to my ramblings and I just won’t go into it. I’m glad I did, my life was Topsy Turvy. My parenting skills were Shakey, my marriage a Shamble, my direction and goals, my life in general Shakey. I couldn’t grasp it all and I feel things are finally a bit clearer. I can work on being a better parent and that’s ultimately my goal to be there for my kids! To help them grow into healthy adults. To be there for my family, but also to be there for myself.

Maybe next year I’ll finally get it altogether. But I won’t beat myself up that it’s taken me 40 years to get to where I need to be.